Many times, I wish life was a etch-a-sketch. Being able to shake away the imperfections that I have seemingly made of it all. I find that the areas I once excelled at are now the areas I struggle with the most. Reflecting on a recent tweet by Cornel West: “Where there is no death, there is no life”, I am struck with the stark reality that certain areas of my life must die before there can be any life brought to it. This is the end picture, the sum of all my parts. They must be brought together before the whole process is complete. I have not sought to become complete. I have brought to life areas once dead (or assumed they were dead), and have neglected to put to death areas that need it. I ramble, due in part because I do not know the true outcome of what I am trying to conceptualize, but I know I am in need of constant restoration.

Marcel: “Why does Angelo always plate on a spoon?”

Yeah, why?

Last nights episode was hard to watch for so many reasons:

1) Jamie’s ridiculous behavior in the competition. Why not serve your dish? Why did you basically hide under a table while your team needed you to step up? I mean, it was bad enough that Carla put you to SHAME by chopping her thumb off, then manning up, putting a band-aid on, and cooking the rest of her dish. But no, you had to whine and beg not to serve your plate. You put yourself to shame, and cost your team. Jamie does not deserve to be there at this point.

2) Spike! Why?! One of the top three chef’s on the show this season. Spike is an innovator, crafty, and just plain cool. Sad to see you go, sorry you let Angelo harsh your mellow, but dude, stand by your food.

3) Why does Angelo plate on only a spoon? Marcel hit it on the head! That question has bothered me for the last two years. Angelo is quite possibly the most annoying chef I have watched on this show. His subtle sabotage of other chef’s dishes. The quite, passive-aggressive mind games he plays on the other chefs. I’m ready for someone to take him to task on it. Kevin tried last year, and I have a feeling there is going to be an EPIC showdown between him and Marcel. I’m ready for it to happen.

The show lacked Bourdain, and I missed his presence last night, more Bourdain = better show.

Fabio, good to see you pull together a good dish, I’m happy for you. Just wish Tony would have been on hand to witness it.

Carla. It is always good to see a chef win, especially when other’s doubted the dish you were putting out. Carla is one of my all time favorites. Not because she is an awesome cook, but because she is an awesome person. She’s got charisma, spirit, and some killer chops. Good on her!

Until Next time.

I am totally a sucker for this show. I mean, c’mon, there is nothing comparable on TV, and IMHO, it is far and away the best reality show on TV. His year, they have brought back all of the best or near winners of the past seasons. And on top of it, they have added Tony Bourdain as the guest judge for the season. Bourdain automatically make it awesome.

To date, the competition has been cut-throat. With Jen going home in the early stages, you know it’s going to be a tough year.

My early favorites are Blaise, Spike, Dale, and Trey. I am a Tiffany fan but she obviously doesn’t seem to have the same edge as last season. Marcel really intrigues me, and I like his style and demeanor. Angelo, while being a good chef, just rubs me the wrong way (sad because he a dead on doppelgänger for my younger brother Peter). I was pretty happy about Marcel calling him on meddling with other chef’s food and playing mind games last week. Fabio is amazing, if just for the comic relief between he and Bourdain. He clearly is out of his element, and is over compensating.

Hang on folks! This is gonna be a great season, especially for a show that continues to get better and add amazing comps and quickfires!

I was struck by how much I have neglected to be thankful for all I have been given, and have realized how much I take the life I have for granted. I have reflected on the fact that I all have is a gift, and that I am in no way entitled to what I have.

I really want to be a man that is grateful for all he has, and one that takes advantage of every waking moment in my life. Being someone who is cognizant of all these things means I am one who knows who has given me all things.

Every day I want to thank my creator and author for a child who runs to me when I come home. For a wife who loves me despite my faults. The little things like the smell of a pine tree in my living room, Heat in my house, legs to walk on, the warmth of the sun on a cold day, a naked son who dodges his parents before a bath, and music, that lifts and inspires.

I could go on and on, listing so many of the things that bring me joy. I am grateful knowing that even by marveling at these many things, I am bringing joy to my creator who has made all things to point to his infinite creativity and craftsmanship.

May I never cease to bring you praise, and may you always be on my mind, heart, and lips.

So, what to write…why write? Life has been comfortably slow recently.  Nothing new to report…just trying to figure things out…

I think I will work on publishing my Music of 2008 post this week…so many good albums, so many good songs! Who will get my Album of the Year vote?

Well they arrive and I take them out of their nice FedEx package, and then transport them to my computer desk…

Well later last week, I cleaned off my desk, and by some stupid chance, I threw my tickets into the trash…

I had the thought that I had done that yesterday afternoon, and looked all around my desk, hoping it wasn’t true…sadly it was!

Good thing, the trash had not been thrown out, so I go down to the dumpster looking for my trash…and tickets…

I open the lid, and there is piles of decaying food from the restaurant under our apartment, maggots, flies, and who knows what else!

I dig around, until I find the bag that I thought they were in, I open it up, rummage through several time, and they are not there…and I am not going to dig through another layer of God knows what!  So I head inside dejected, mad, smelly…etc.

So the tickets are gone, the trash was removed this morning, and I just bought a new pair online…making this the most expensive purchase for Cubs tickets, for me, ever!

Needless to say, I feel like a stupid idiot…

• We went to a family reunion in McLeansboro, IL.  It was fun to get to catch up with Erin’s Mom’s side of the family for an afternoon.  We left pretty early on Saturday, and made it back later that night. Some of the highlights were listening to the Family Tree being read, putting flower’ on Grandma Wilson’s grave, eating some good BB-Q (Thanks Uncle Lee!), making the road trip with Erin next to me, and stopping for pizza at Pryor’s on the way back!

• Two weeks ago, Erin and I went to Alley Spring, just outside of Eminence, MO.  It was a nice trip, sunny, warm, and it was just nice to get out of the apartment for the day and spend time with one another.  It seems that life gets pretty busy, and we miss opportunities to take advantage of something other than the TV.

• We took a trip to Counsel Bluff last weekend.  Erin and I really like to go swimming, and this was the first time for us this year.  I was nice to drive, and listen to music while having all the windows down! Thanks God for the beautiful weather!

• Sunday we celebrated Father’s Day at the Gidcumb’s.  It was a lazy day playing chess and pinochle, and laying on the porch reading my new favorite book: Peace, Love, & Barbecue: Recipes, Secrets, Tall Tales, and Outright Lies from the Legends of Barbecue! (I would recommend anyone buying this book, especially you good foodies! I got an amazing deal on this one at Amazon, and bought one for me and my dad!) I tell you what, it was a fun afternoon, except for my Cubs getting it handed to them by San Diego!  It was a good day filled with family and food!

The summer seems to be flying by

If we strongly believe that war is not the answer to violence or terrorism, how should we react to those who feel strongly that it is? What if that person is family?

I have heard the arguments for a benevolent war, but I can’t help but think there is a better way…

Thoughts…

I have been saving for a while, and the chance came, it was a little anti-climactic…but it will be here in about a week…

It’s  80gb, Black…

I’m looking forward to it